See??? I Never Said They Were Perfect!

Medium Pants has issues. Everything in his world must be even, equal and fair. The world must revolve around him. It is written. I was told by a friend that this was just a stage - I surely hope so. He isn't spoiled and we are quick to discipline, so I don't know where this came from and why it exists.

Here is a wonderful example that made my eyes pop out and me drive home with him in COMPLETE silence. Those of you with kids know that never happens. Ever. We went back to school shopping at a local store and the boy racked way up. They were having a big sale and I did very well with my purchases AND used my 20% off coupon. I got him 5 pairs of pants, 4 pairs of shorts and 7 shirts - for $68. Amazing - I was so proud. And I let him pick out what he wanted, within reason, so I thought I was being a good parent. I didn't buy anything for either of the other Pants. Just Medium Pants. It was all about him.

As we were leaving, after a restroom break, we had to pass through the purse section. Yes, I know. I know. Like a moth to the flame. I said I was going to look just a tad since they were having such a superb sale - he just rolled his eyes and laughed (even my kids know how I am about purses...) . I found a lovely little purse that fit so perfectly on my shoulder and was marked down to $17 from $45 - Dear Lord, that's criminal!! He asked if I was going to buy it and I said I thought I might.


He made a strange face and then asked "What do I get to get?"

I said "What?"

He said "What do I get to get? You are getting something."

I said "I believe that bag of $70 worth of crap is what you are getting."

He said "But I didn't want this stuff. Don't I get to get something I want?"

I said "Ummm. You are kidding, right?"

We stood and stared at each other.

He said "It's not fair. I want something too."

At that very moment - with the mention of the "It's not fair" mantra - I think my head exploded. Splattering brain matter and blood all over the lovely purses on sale.

I just turned and walked out of the store and to the car. With no explanation, no comment and no emotion (even though I was now headless). He ran along behind me dragging that bag loaded down with things he didn't even want. We got in the car and he knew he had messed in his nest as my daddy would have put it.

He said "But, Mama, I just wanted something I want since you were going to get something you wanted."

I said "I suggest you keep your mouth shut. Do not even speak to me because I do not want to hear a word you have to say."


We got home after a fun filled 40 minute ride of death and Pants knew immediately upon seeing my face the shit was about to hit the fan. I filled him in and let him handle the lecture and all. I was far too angry and would have said something I regretted. It wasn't just the selfishness of his behavior, it was also the fact that I didn't buy that purse! $17 people!! Holy Crap.

Pants said afterward that I didn't need another purse anyway. Idiot - doesn't he realize that I have to assist the economy and that purse will never be that cheap again?!?!

Just to prove my point, I am going by that store on my lunch hour later this week and buying the damn thing. I just dare one of them to say something about it. I will splatter brain matter and blood in their faces! That'll show them!